Defining Success – Part of Chapter II of the upcoming book ”Find Your Passion”

Defining Success – Part of Chapter II of the upcoming book ”Find Your Passion”

17th of June, 2010

”You have 3 options: Law, Engineering or Medical School. Choose one of them.”, he says and pauses for a few seconds… ”You can choose anything you like of course!”
Absolutely imprisoned in my own home, find the courage to speak up:
– Dad…I don’t think I love either of these.. Think there must be other options too…
– If you want financial stability, you need to pick one of these. Pick one..now!
Being confused; being lost; somewhere at a place of fear and discomfort, respond with hesitation:
– Ok…I’m not good at math, so suppose that Law would be nice. Always loved public speaking anyway! Plus, it sounds really cool! Defending people’s rights! Human rights! Plus, public speaking!

– Great. All set. You’d better start studying. Just two years to go for the entrance exams.

And just like that, I got back to work.

15th of July, 2012

It’s time. I’m sitting in my bedroom, in my hometown, Athens. It’s noon, and it’s hot. TOO HOT. Typical Greek summer. Am turning on my black laptop, an HP 2007 model. ”www.eduexamsresults.gr”, I type. It’s time. After 2 years of vigorous studying, for 10 hours a day, day-in day-out – excluding the school hours; after a ton of personal life sacrifices, 26.5 pounds heavier, 10 years older than my biological age, and a chronic emotional pressure, the moment of truth is here and now – At least I thought so back then –

Minimum grade to pass in Law school: 18.15/20. Am looking for my surname, scrolling down ridiculously slow to make sure to not miss it. Here it is! Move the cursor along the extremely narrow lines where my personal details and the results are. Move it ridiculously slowly as well; this time to make sure I won’t fall to a different line profile. Results. 18.44…. I’M IN! ”YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSS”, screamed from my bedroom’s balcony. My voice must have echoed 15 to 20 blocks away.

All this effort; all this hassle; all these sacrifices; all this persistence and focus on my goal have been finally fruited. The best part? I passed in Law school in Thrace, North Greece. That means 473.4 miles away from home. This means one simple thing for me: FREEDOM! Am going to have my own apartment! Completely alone! And there’s more: The school was in Komotini, one of the most popular student cities in Greece!

Everyone now is proud of me and happy. My dad is happy ; my mom is happy; my best friends, teachers, and a few acquaintances of mine are happy. I’m proud. How couldn’t someone not be? Achieving my biggest and most challenging breakthrough goal so far; winning my freedom and independence; getting MY LIFE back. ”I won!”, I thought.

But what game did I win? And whose game? Was it MY game? Was it MY success? Or someone else’s? My dad’s, mom’s, teachers’, or the obsolete educational system’s success?

– What the f*** is success anyway?, this last thought quickly crossed my mind.

– Well, it doesn’t really matter, I arrogantly responded to this weird voice that popped up in my head.  ”I‘m in Law school. A place which more than 23000 candidates wanted to be in, and which is the very first choice of more than 4000 high school students. I have fame and prestige now.”, I bragged. ”And I ACHIEVED it!”

– But what about my dreams? Did this weird voice pop up again. ”Do I actually have any dreams……?

And just like that, I’m in Law school. Proud of making my loved ones proud; proud of myself; full of life, curiosity and hunger to serve human rights.

Or maybe not?

Pride is a quick boost of confidence rather than a source of happiness.

Is success something standard in our times? And if so, what standard means? What are the criteria of success? Are they objective, representing a universally acceptable truth? If so, how are they defined? And more importantly, who defines them? The few ones? Whether they belong to the socioeconomic elite, spiritual elite or political leadership? Or, the vast majority of people? Our society? Our culture? If so, locally, nationally, internationally? What if none of them but a higher, more powerful non-human force? Whether it’s God, nature, universe, or anything else?

This time, it really doesn’t matter. What it does matter is answering for yourself right now the following questions:

What is success to you?

How do you define it?

Game time:

Forget what others think of success; whether it’s money, social status, prestige, political power, a bunch of love partners, etc. Grab a pen and paper and write down now:

1. What you really want.
2. What you believe it makes you happy.

Answer this questions as fast as possible for at least 10 minutes. It’s beyond the first lines that the real juice comes up.

So, write down:

 What I really want is________________________________________________________ 

What makes me truly happy is___________________________________________________

Feel free to connect with me on Facebook and LinkedIn, as well as check my upcoming book ”Find Your Passion”, by visiting my personal site JimPanos360.com