The Paradigm of Duality – Part of Chapter V of the upcoming book “Find Your Passion”
If you want to maximize your impact, profits, and fulfillment at work, you need to start thinking differently. How? Stop thinking in terms of “it has to be either . . . or . . .” This is one of the most dangerous unconscious biases (limiting beliefs) that can hold you back from creating a career with more success and abundance.
In fact, you cannot imagine how many people are into this one—how many times you might have thought this way. This is the “dilemma” limiting belief. The paradigm of duality. The “black-or-white” or “polarization” mentality. “I can either keep my job or start my own business,” “I can either go to college or get a low-paying job,” “I can succeed either at work or in my personal life,” “I can be either a great spouse or a great professional,” “I can either follow my passion and be broke or be wealthy and unfulfilled at work” are just a few thoughts you might have because of this belief.
When you have these thoughts, you think in an absolute and extreme way. Life is much richer and more colorful than a mere “either . . . or . . .” Can you imagine the rainbow as only black and white? Of course not! Well, that’s exactly what you do with yourself. You cut off all the colorful and juicy options you have—because you always have more than two options. Always. Why should you limit yourself to the poor number of two when you can find so many more alternatives?
Remember this: One option is a dead end. Two options is a dilemma. You need at least three options to avoid making a bad decision. Notice that I said, “to avoid making a bad decision,” not to make the very best decision. To do this, you need to entirely change the “either . . . or . . .” belief. How? Ask yourself this question: “How can I have both?”
Yes. You can eat the whole pie, not just a piece of it. Think of it this way: you preset your mind with every word you say, every statement you make, and every question you ask. Remember also that a statement “closes” your mind whereas a question “opens” it. Wouldn’t it better for you and your best interest to enjoy both good options, or have a few more alternatives, rather than limiting yourself to a single option? If this makes sense to you, wouldn’t it be extreme in this sense to go for only one option?
Yes. You can have anything you want. This doesn’t mean anytime you want, because prioritization and focus are key for finding a career with more impact, income, and fulfillment. On the other hand, focus does not exclude harmony in your life. It does mean that managing your time more effectively includes spending less time in areas of your life that are not a priority. Yes, you can follow your passion and be a great spouse and parent. You can both keep your job and start your own business on the side. You can be wealthy without a college degree. You can be happy and successful both in work and in life. You can discover your passion and make a living at it. You can follow your passion and make a fortune at it! You can have both a rewarding and a fulfilling career. You can be both wealthy and passionate about what you do.
So, from now on, every time you catch yourself starting to think “either . . . or . . .,” ask yourself these questions:
- How can I have both?
- How can I expand my options?
- What other options are available to me?
Now, let’s reframe, shall we?
- You can have both.
- You can find and make a fortune at your passion.
LESS THAN 2 DAYS before the publication of the “Find Your Passion” book! It’s coming on January 15! Pre-order it to save 50% and transform your career and life here.