“I’ve had it”

I’ve had it

Life is full of ups and downs. There will be great days, which look like a dream, days you wouldn’t change them for anything in the world. There will also be times that will push you to your limits and make you quit. You will reach a point where you can no longer withstand the pressure, the routine and the difficulties of life and make you think: “Enough! I’ve had it! I cannot do this anymore!” How many times have we been in this position, in this state of mind that a situation or an event has forced us to give up trying? The most important moment of growing and overcoming challenges is the second before we take the decision to “surrender” because that’s when our limits are tested. Let me give you an example.

A couple of months ago, before I make our weekly call with a client of mine, he texted me this: “That’s it. I’m done with it.” I immediately called him to check what’s going on. After he picked up, he started yelling that he wants to quit. He was nervous, disappointed and he almost seemed like he was apologizing for something. He was panicking. I asked him to take a moment to relax without thinking about his problems and to explain what made him feel like that. He ends up telling me that his life was in a loop and he was disgusted by it. He was working overtime as a driver in a delivery service to pay his bills and he had no time for himself and the things he was passionate about. He likes working out a lot but in his limited free time; he spends it with the family, taking care of his kids. He adopted a few harmful habits in order to stay away from the pressure he was feeling. Long story short, he didn’t like himself at all. He didn’t like what he became. So, you could say: “If he wasn’t happy with his life, why didn’t he change that?” It’s so simple yet so difficult if you’re trapped in a single perspective that keeps dragging you down.

How can we escape from that?

I told him: “Imagine that where you’re standing right now is your life as you described it. I want you to change your position in your room and keep looking at your previous spot (your life).

1) Step Back

Luke 5:16 “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed”.

When we are stuck in a certain problem or situation, it’s very difficult to discover and examine a different approach and perspective for our problems. What we have to do is, to take a step back, examine the situation more clearly and see the choices that we have.

Questions that will help you to take a step back are listed below:

• How do I feel about the situation I’m in right now?
• Am I stressed, angry, confused?
• How can I change that?
• What choices do I have? (Make a list)
• How do I feel about them?
• Am I ready to change? (Hold yourself accountant)

In my client’s case, he had to “retreat” from his problems for a while to think without stress. He asked himself those questions and he decided that he has to plan his everyday life more carefully and more importantly he must “create” time for himself.

2) Desire

Your desire to change might be anything, a quote, a picture, a conversation with someone, a song, a seminar or in my case a video. It was enough for me to make me learn about life coaching and go after it.

3) Focus on one thing

When you feel that “enough is enough”, in order to change that, you have to focus on one thing at a time. The key is to break down the problem into smaller pieces, so you can focus on each piece separately. For instance, you feel pressure from many things, your relationship, your neglected body, your studies your family, etc. Make a plan, write down those things you want to change and start by order of priority. One change at a time. Because to win your “war” you have to focus on every battle separately.

4) Don’t put up the walls

I would like to close this article with something Jim Rohn used to say in his seminars.
“Don’t put up the walls! The same wall that keeps you disappointed keeps out happiness. Take down the walls, go for the experience and let it teach you.”